Here's A Thing (mostly about me) Hello Narcissism

I don't know if I'm ever going to post this.I'm not sure how much to share before it becomes to much.I've just been so frustrated and I wanna to say a few things without being melodramatic and using more than 140 characters.So here I am posting on my old blog I haven't used in 2 years.SORRY IN ADVANCE THIS IS HELLA LONG.IM SO LONG WINDED,MY GOSH.

I don't know where to start so let's begin with general stuff about the internet.It's a massive place where people can find information and communicate with one another.For a lot of people like myself it's a fundamental part of our social lives,possibly even the only part.Which can lead to an unhealthy level of.....obsession.Although that word seems a little strong.We obsess about popularity,how we come across,offending people and more.To the point where something that happens here can completely rock us emotionally.People like to say it's just the internet,how can you really connect with people you've never met?It's not a big deal,it doesn't matter,but they'd be wrong.It's so easy to connect with someone here.You can find friends with similar interests and commiserate with kindred spirits.It's especially grand for those of us who are socially awkward or find it hard to talk to people face to face.However it's also easy to lose your humanity in dealings on the internet.To forget that you're talking to people with feelings,who can be hurt.To judge people based on misinterpretations or misunderstandings.

So here's what I really wanted to talk about.The weight your words hold for people who take the internet seriously.Some who don't have any other means of social interaction or who consider this sanctuary.Others who just don't see the separation between real life friends and internet friends.We all say things here without seriously thinking about them at one time or another.Maybe because we think our words are valid since the people we're talking to are perceived idiots or because we think it's funny to "troll" and say whatever dumb shit comes to mind for our amusement.And it can be but it can also really hurt people.I'm not saying you shouldn't say to someone hey you're being an ass or I disagree with you because...but there's a line.If you really think someone is a racist fucker or a woman hating idiot why sink to their level.Why not just say hey I take issue with this thing you said and i feel like you're a shithead and block them???Why continuously talk about them/bring attention to them?Will sending a whole bunch of attention toward them and their bigoted opinions have any positive effects?Probably not,considering if what they said was so heinous as to in site such fiery they're probably ignorant and not worth you're time in the first place.Even if you think someone's wrong should you really be telling them to kill themselves?Or constantly talking about how awful they are?Your words can be more powerful than you know.People have killed themselves because someone on the internet told them they were worthless or put them down.Do you really want to be responsible for anyone hurting them self or committing suicide?

Then there's the cliques and disagreements or misunderstandings.If you've spent any time in public school you probably already know this but heads up.You don't have to agree on everything to be friends.You can like people or things that your friends don't like and still get along.Also a disagreement does not have to conclude in "drama".People can have opinions you can argue those opinions with facts and logic and without name calling and come out on the other side of it friends.And most importantly there's no reason to believe that someone who you've been friendly with would intentionally insult you,so ask what they meant before jumping to conclusions.Things are so easily mis-typed or thought to be about something when they're not at all.So many friendships have ended over unintended slights or petty grudges held.Get that stuff out.Ask people straight up,was that about me?Did you mean it negatively?That alone might save you some trouble.Don't judge people based on their friends.Or your friends opinions on them figure out for yourself how you feel.There are certain popular people who once they believe they've been wronged or slighted do everything in their power to make you agree with them about a person or situation.Who use their influence to conduct metaphorical witch hunts and destroy relationships between people they feel are wrong/bad and their followers,fans or friends.Take your friends opinion into account sure but make your own decisions.If don't judge someone if you can't possibly know everything about the situation that's occurring.

The reason I'm saying all this is definitely because I've encountered these situations personally.I would be lying if I said I didn't have specific people in mind.And I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being butthurt or caremad or whatever you want to call it about things that have occurred recently.But it's not just about twitter or the internet or about right now.It's not even just about me.People have been hurt by this stuff guys.I'm not trying to be a judgy judge here.I'm as guilty as the next person of jumping on the bandwagon and saying mean things to someone I barely know or going to far because I was mad and the other person was "wrong wrong wrong and did you see what that idiot fucker just said.hes so fucking dumb,yeah guys you should totally laugh at him ahahahhaha one less pro life nut job on the planet would be great.he should totally kill him self." I've been the person saying it and I've been the person that vitriol was aimed at.To the point where I've felt so horrible so evil so god awful and worthless I've cried for hours.I've hurt myself.I've contemplated suicide.Especially as of late.I've been sick for about four years now.People got tired of dealing with me and my sickness and my depression and they stopped calling.So I can officially say the internet is my one outlet for social interaction.And I get wrapped up in it and it HURTS to be attacked or disregarded here.Just as much as it does in real life.It hurts more then people will ever admit to themselves.People have stopped going to sites they once enjoyed because they came away from it feeling so awful.I've seen many a web buddy hurting in similar ways.This thing this internet has so much power and it can be used to bring so much happiness and so much pain and sorrow.

So in short (hardy har by that I mean very long and probably more melodramatic than intended).I know a lot of you guys are better than that.You just get swept up and over emotional and start saying things without thinking.I do it all the time and get myself into trouble because of it.Stop for 2 seconds and think to your self.This person is fucking dreadful really,and I'm pissed but I'm also better than them.So I won't even give them the satisfaction.I won't even waste my time.Or possibly think before I even get mad about this was this intended to piss me off am I understanding this correctly?Could this person just be having a shit day and aiming their animosity at me without intending to?Do something else,come back to it.Maybe some of the resulting drama or anger could be avoided and you could spend more time having fun here.

Anyways that's how I feel about a thing.If i come off as pompous or self-centered well...I won't completely deny either of those labels.I wrote this in hopes someone may read it and agree and not lose a friend over something dumb but I also wrote it cause I had some bad feelings I wanted to get out.So here's the thing I guess.Feel free to judge me now.

Here's hoping....

Yes I know I have no followers but I'm hoping eventually if i keep writing about well... music recommendations and random crap that doesn't matter eventually someone will care enough to follow my blog.

http://www.greenlabelsound.com/ That's a link to website that has free downloads of tracks by artists i really like.Matt and Kim and are a slightly more random less cutesy version of Mates of State and if you haven't heard of them go download they're track "Daylight".Chromeo is Canada's answer to 80's dance jams.go download they're song "Night By Night".Both are available at the site above.

Okay yesterday I was youtubing, an activity i spend far to much time on,when i stumbled upn this dude named Todd Kuffner.He's a singer-songwriter with insane guitar skils.Kind of like John Mayer but better.Check out some of his music on youtube just search toddmakesnoise.support this guy and hopefully he'll put out a cd because he's amazing.

So that's it for today.hopefully someone's reading this because who speaks only to hear themselves .....that was a rhetorical question.peace.

Introductions

Well I couldn't quite figure out what to do here exactly.I mean what could I possibly write about that people would actually care to read.Then I thought about my ginormous music collection and how much of a music nerd I am and I figured, there it is.I'll write about what I know, music.So yeah thats what my space is about,even if the name doesn't reflect that.I mean it was like 3:30 in the morning when I chose it(plus I like to make up Words :D).So here goes.

A few songs I recommend you listen to:

Songname - artist

Blush - Plumb
Evil Urges - My Morning Jacket
I Let You Down - Joel Plasket
Feel It In Your Bones - Tiesto f Tegan and Sara(the live version with the twins is better)

Fare warning there will be a lot of Tegan and Sara Recommendations. So yeah that's it for now.Unless I can think Of something to add later.Peace.